Sometimes I awaken in the night.  This time can be brief or it might be an hour.  I see the light of a full moon through the transom windows up high in the bedroom.  Or I hear a distant train recalling the wonderful memory of riding a train as a child all the way from West Texas to Indiana to see my Grandmother.  Although there are times when my mind is racing 90 miles per minute, most of the time this awakening is quite peaceful and special.  It is as if there is a presence reminding me of my deeper self, my true self.  There is a “knowing” which happens in the stillness of the night that can be lost in the busyness of days with routine and schedules.  It is like awakening to being known and loved which nourishes my heart and soul.

We have an old German clock which you see in the photo above.  It has soft, beautiful chimes.  They don’t wake me up, but if I am awake I hear them.  The clock has been in every home of ours and over the years we have only had it serviced a couple of times.  It is dependable.  I can listen to the chimes in the night and know what time it is…how long I have been awake.  It does not bother me; it comforts me.  It is a beautiful, assuring sound….the gift of time.

This reminds me of a letter I received as a young mother.  I was in my 30’s when my Mom was going for tests to discern cancer.  I could not bear the thought of the possibility of losing her.  She was a rock of faith for me, and the most loving person I knew.  The letter, which I still have, was from my church youth director. She and her husband had young children when they led my youth group in high school.  They were very influential in my life and my faith journey.  Here is a quote from that letter….

“Dear Nancy…It seems the sun should come up earlier and go down a different time on days like today when someone so near and dear is facing something as tremendous as your mother is today!  It seems strange that people go to work, children play…that birds sing and rain still falls.  The message in this sameness in the world, I guess, is that God works in everything in a very constant way so that we all…especially your mother and her precious family, keep going regardless of the tasks of this day.  The sun comes up as it should.  Our near and dear have strength for today.”

Although I received many expressions of love during that difficult time, these words were the ones that brought a strength and hope I needed to move forward.  I could count on the sun coming up again every day!

It is early morning as I write this.  Sunrise will soon come over the horizon out my back window.  I hear the birds singing.  The beauty of God’s world is all around me and I know I am loved.  Thanks God!

nk

All of us have the gift of music to appreciate and enjoy.  Certain songs, certain types of music have a way of touching our hearts, our souls, at a given moment and we experience something deep inside of us.  Music can communicate in powerful ways beyond words!  Then there are certain people who have been given the gift of music in special ways.  It seems that the music lives inside of them and bubbles up from within.  It is as if this is the spiritual gift given to them by God from the moment of creation.  It comes from the inside out, rather than the outside in.  Music lives in their soul and creation happens through this music alive in them.

In one of the photos above my two year old grandson is dancing.  We were at an outdoor music concert in Colorado.  The dance is not something he had learned before.  He was not performing, or even aware that others were watching.  What I saw happen was the music welled up inside of him until he could no longer contain himself.  It bubbled up in such a way that his body was freely expressing the music alive in his soul. It came from the inside out.  It was a joyful moment I won’t forget.

The other photo is of my dear high school friend.  When she plays the piano it is a spiritual moment for me and others who hear.  For her, it is her life.  It is the fullness of who she is, who God created her to be.  It is the Spirit of God alive in her and being poured out through her.  She composes the music already inside her.  It comes from the inside out.  When I visited her this summer we stopped by the chapel where she plays on Sunday mornings.  The window above the altar overlooks a beautiful pond.  She sat down to play the piano spontaneously, and what came flowing out of her was her own beautiful rendition of “Morning Has Broken”. I thought, “That is my very favorite hymn which she is playing for me in this beautiful new way, and she doesn’t even know!”  Her gift became a gift to me, and I will never forget that moment.

I stand in awe of these dear ones, and others who are close to me who have the gift of music.  Beautiful things are born through their creative expression of the music they hear inside their soul.  Such a wonderful gift!  I hope they know.  I hope you know!

nk

 

I just have to show you this sailfish caught by my Uncle Paul.  It still hangs over the fireplace in the Lake House where we were staying this past week.  The fact that he could maneuver reeling in a fish as big as he was, and that he stuck it out for 1 hour and 31 minutes says a lot about him.  He was 74 in this photo.  Notice his “fishing pants”. Pretty dapper don’t you think?  And he does not look the least bit ruffled after fighting this big fish for 1 1/2 hours!

My Uncle Paul loved boats and being on the lake.  It all started on Yellow Lake in northern Indiana at a church camp.  The tale is told that as a youth at camp he rigged up a sailboat using a canoe and sheets from his bed because he wanted to go faster in the boat.

His entire life he was happiest when he provided the opportunity for others to have a good time on the water.  He kept his boats in pristine condition. ( like those pants I suppose). I remember as a young child being on a house boat on the Ohio River with his family.  On Lake Tippy I remember him pulling me behind the boat on water skis for the first time.  This began many years for me of loving to water ski, hopping the wake of the boat on a slalom ski.

Uncle Paul seemed to be a different person at the lake.  At home he was quite serious, and as a child I was a bit intimidated by him.  He seemed very intense away from the lake. As a renowned home builder in his community, he designed and built the best homes in town, according to his reputation.  Integrity and quality were his trademarks.

When he died, I was asked to give his memorial.  What happened that night at the Funeral Home during visitation spoke volumes about who he was.  There was a line all the way out the front door of the Funeral Home and around the outside of the building, of people waiting to pass by the coffin and pay their respects to my aunt.  Those people represented all walks of life in every way, and I stood in awe of that sight!  In all my ministry, I had never seen anything like that.

As I write this to you today, I am a little surprised that I chose to write about him.  He was not the relative to whom I felt the closest.  In fact, quite the opposite.  But what I realize is that he provided the opportunity for me to enjoy many summers at the lake, and it was his greatest joy to do just that. There are many wonderful memories for me of those summers!  And he was a man who clearly impacted many lives in his community!

The scripture I chose for his memorial service was Micah 6:8….”and what does the Lord require of you?  To act justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.”  Thanks Uncle Paul, for who you are, and for what you gave to me!

nk

This week I am in Indiana with my sister and two cousins.  We four girls are staying in a cottage on Lake Tippecanoe where we used to spend many summers together as teenagers.  There are such great memories here, and we are telling stories moment by moment with laughter and love.  The cottage belonged to my Aunt and Uncle and looks so much the same that it is truly like stepping back in time.  The cottage is the one story home in tourquoise that you see in the photo.  Last night we rode in the boat at sunset and went by the Tippy Dance Hall where I spent many moments dancing the night away.  It looks a lot like a white barn and is still lit up in neon lights!

My cousin Cheryl and I were always the ones finding some adventure.  This morning we went looking for fresh vegetables.  We found a roadside stand in front of a large farm where we purchased fresh corn and tomatoes.  YUM!  We wanted green beans and the two farmers said they had some in the field but no one wanted to pick them.

SO….here we are!…..picking our own green beans!! …. Making another memory.  Reminds me of the movie “City Slickers”!  I have never been in a big farm field before picking green beans!  Very fun! I am reminded of the first three lines of the poem “For the Traveler” which you can find in my previous blog….

“Every time you leave home,

another road takes you

into a world you were never in.”

I hope you love adventure as much as I do.  I think it keeps us young!

nk

This is Big Sky Montana.  It is just SO full of God’s peace and beauty!

View above the altar at Soldier’s Chapel where we worshipped on Sunday.  I get to preach one Sunday next summer…..what a joy!

Birds right on our back deck.  I was outside sketching and they were about two feet from me….so close! Last night there were 5 hummingbirds at this feeder at the same time, enjoying their meal together.

 

These moments were in Yellowstone yesterday, with the exception of the elk who were in a meadow close to our condo.  Don’t you love that buffalo?  The structure is the interior of Old Faithful Inn built in late 1800s.

Lunch outside with friends enjoying the beauty around us.  In the midst of our conversation we discovered we were all married in the same year, and in the following year we all lived within a block of each other at the same time at the corner of San Felipe and Fountainview in Houston.  What are the odds of that?

All of this and more…..such a gift of God’s creation!  I hope you are finding some of God’s beauty in your world today!

nk

John O’Donohue is one of my favorite poets, and this is one of my favorite poems. I took a photo of it while flying to Montana, one of my favorite places.  Hopefully you can click on the photo and enlarge it enough for you to read.  If not, you can google the name of the poem and poet to find the printed words.  It’s a great poem!

I have had many very special moments while traveling with family or with a friend.  This poem is full of phrases that hold deep thoughts and feelings.  I find myself reading it slowly again and again, remembering, enjoying, and anticipating.  So much to think about and hold in my heart about traveling as I land in beautiful Montana.  I love Montana!

As you read the poem, ask yourself…..What phrase do you like?  What is it about that phrase that speaks to you? Have you experienced in your traveling what the poem expresses?

More on Montana soon…..

nk

I have been participating in an art class this week and two of the collages I have done are pictured above.  One of the things I love about collage is that as the artist I have no preconceived notion of what the painting is going to look like.  I am free to enter the creative process, working with creativity itself while it is happening.  Since God is the Creator, I see this as a journey with God.  Ultimately I will see one or many things within the painting.  But always it is more than anything I could have done alone, for creativity is truly a gift of God.  It is who God is, what God does, and something God chooses to do in and through us.

The other great thing about collage is the freedom for you, the viewer, to see what is present for you to experience.  It is not about what a painting is “supposed to look like”.  It is about what the painting stirs inside you to touch your own feelings and experience.

When my son Steve saw these paintings he said, “I love the colors in this one.  They remind me of what you would see in southern Utah.”  This made me smile, knowing how much he loves the natural beauty in Utah where he has been rock climbing.  I have not seen Utah like he has.  How special that this is present for him in my painting!  Indeed, God paints!  I remember Steve’s words to me in a moment one summer when he and I were driving west together.  We were headed to California where he would begin an internship as an architect.  Driving into a beautiful setting sun before us, he said, “Mom, I thank God everyday for the gift of creativity,”

I invite you to enter the painting.  What do you see?  What do you experience?  For what are you thankful?

nk

Sometimes life takes us to an unknown place.  We may have some notions of what this place could be like, or we may have no idea at all.  We have not yet been there. Life is continually a journey into the unknown. A friend shared with me today that he has been told he has Alzheimers/Dementia.  There have been no outward signs, no suspicions at all by anyone.  It is a total shock!  It is truly hard to believe and I find myself struggling over the news.  I don’t want to see this happening to my friend.  How fast will it come?  What about his family and friends?  How will it be for him inside that unknown place?  What will he know and understand?  What will he not know?  What will he not understand?

I began to think of moments in my ministry that spoke to me….

–  Jane had Alzheimer’s in a late stage.  We were not sure who she knew or did not know.  She seemed uneasy at this moment.  I had come to bring her Holy Communion.  I gently placed a very tiny crumb of the bread into her mouth and said,  “Jane, Jesus loves you.”  I wondered if she heard me inside that unknown place.  She tasted.  Then a wonderful peace came over her.  She smiled and continued the sentence softly….” loves me…….loves me………..loves me……………..loves…………..me………….”.  She knew.

– Leslie had lost her sight suddenly.  I had known her for years.  Such devastating news that she would not regain her sight!  She now must learn a new way to live.  Years later I saw her again in another city.  Across the room I became captivated seeing her face as we were singing a worship song about the light.  She had a beautiful glow on her face.  I felt so sad watching her sing while knowing her loss.  Later as we talked, I expressed my feelings to her.  She responded, “Nancy, what you don’t know is that when I became blind, the light never left me! I have always seen the light!”  Wow!  I had no idea.

– Our Mission Team was on our way to an unknown place in Africa.  What would it be like?  As we flew over the Sahara Desert, the world’s largest hot desert, I looked out the window of the plane.  I had never witnessed such a vast picture of miles of nothing but hot sand blown by the wind.  NOTHING.  Yet, I was drawn there.  It was a strong feeling which surprised me!  I realized in that moment, with nothing else present as far as I could see, there could only be God!  Suddenly it all became the fullness of the presence of God.

I think about these moments and I ask…Is this what Alzheimers is like inside that unknown place?  What about any unknown place you and I face?  Perhaps the unknown place is a place of knowing.

I remember the words of scripture….”Nothing in all creation can separate us from the love of God…..” Thanks God!!

nk